Ladies Night
by Guyana Rose
Summary: Quinn comes to the city to visit Rachel and Santana. Rachel gets home from class and finds her friends already intoxicated. Things get heated once Rachel catches up. Girl!peen Rachel. Fapezberry Week, Day 6: College/New York.


**Title:** Ladies Night  
**Author:** Guyana Rose  
**Rating:** T (for now)  
**Pairing:** Fapezberry  
**Word Count:** 1,870  
**Summary:** Quinn comes to the city to visit Rachel and Santana. Rachel gets home from class and finds her friends already intoxicated. Things get heated once Rachel catches up. Fapezberry Week, Day 6: College/New York.  
**A/N:** Currently Unbetaed, please excuse my mistakes; I will be fixing them later. G!P Rachel, just because I couldn't help myself :)  
**Prompt:** Fapezberry Week, Day 6: College/New York.  
**Disclaimer:** I own only the story itself. Glee belongs to R.I.B. Aunt Bunny jokes are from Delirious & belong to Eddie Murphy.

**Please read & review  
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**Chapter 1 - Unwind**

Two in the afternoon finds Quinn Fabray walking back to her dorm room with a smile on her face. Her classes were done for the week and she was headed to New York for some much needed R and R. She'd been surprised after her move out of Lima to learn that Santana had moved into an apartment with Rachel in the city; surprised, but quite okay. Now there were two people she knew in the city that never sleeps and what Rachel wouldn't want to go out and do, Santana most likely would. She grabbed her overnight bag that was already packed and made her way to the train station. About two hours later she was knocking on Rachel and Santana's door.

"It's about time chica. I'm bored out of my skull here."

Such was the greeting she received when Santana opened the door.

"Next time I'll use my whitelighter powers and orb in, would that make you feel better?"

Santana laughed as she shut and locked the door then turned to Quinn and hugged her.

"Missed you, it's been forever," she said.

"I know, classes have been kicking my ass," Quinn replied, "but enough about school where's the halfling so we can start doing shots?"

"She's at a callback for Avenue Q. We'll know if she got it if she's not here in another hour."

"Uh oh, I hope we don't see her for awhile then because I love her but I don't want to be on cheer up duty this weekend."

"No doubt. In any case, either way it goes we're drinking now."

Quinn heartily agreed as she took two of the jello shots Santana offered her. Around eight o'clock Rachel came home to find a very giggly Santana and Quinn sitting on the floor in the living room.

"Rachel!" Santana yelled.

"I'm not deaf bitch I hear you," Rachel said as she walked into the living room.

Quinn got up and hugged Rachel then led her over to the coffee table to join her and Santana.

"Come on double shot to celebrate," Santana said.

"What are we celebrating?" Quinn asked.

"Duh Rachel got the part," Santana said as she poured the drinks.

"Actually, I didn't; at least not the part I wanted but it's okay. The absolute final casting hasn't been done yet so minds could still be changed," Rachel explained.

"What took you so long to get home then?" Santana asked confused.

"I'm actually friends with all the people that auditioned. They wanted to go get drinks so I went along; I only had one though. I wanted to make sure I could still hang with you two," Rachel stated.

"Well we've had more than one so drink up," Quinn said.

They toasted to Rachel's near success and played a short game of Quarters. After another hour Santana retreated to her room and returned with a freshly rolled blunt.

"What is that?" Quinn asked.

"San's new obsession," Rachel laughed as she pulled off her shirt, leaving her in just her sports bra.

"Perra don't act like you don't smoke too," Santana retorted as she sat back down.

"Yeah yeah," Rachel replied.

Living in New York had been good for both Rachel and Santana. Rachel learned to mellow out and not be so high strung and Santana learned to tone her bitchiness down. Both girls found that thought amusing since New York was considered the meanest city in America.

A half an hour later the girls were watching Delirious on Comedy Central and were all close to tears.

_You told me you met your wife fifteen years ago on a motherfucking camping trip, and that your wife was Puerto Rican. Your wife ain't no motherfucking Puerto Rican! I knew she wasn't from the first minute cause I walked up to her and I said: 'Hi, my name is Vernon, nice to meet you.' And she said: 'Hello, My name is Bunny. Goony goo goo!' What the fuck does goony goo goo mean Gus? I don't know what the fuck that shit means to this day. I thought I learned some new Spanish shit! I went up to my friend Sanchez and I said: 'Hey, Sanchez! Goony goo goo!' And Sanchez looked at me and said: 'Get the fuck outta here!' I've been walking around for years confused. And I finally figured out where you met your wife. You didn't meet your motherfucking wife on no camping trip! Your wife is a Bigfoot isn't she Gus?_

Quinn barely caught herself before all the liquid in her mouth hit the coffee table.

_Your wife is a Bigfoot isn't she, that's why the bitch's mustache is so motherfucking thick! Cause you shaved the bitch down and taught her to speak! I know a motherfucking Bigfoot when I see one! Don't bring a Bigfoot in my home Gus. Around my children. The bitch can't talk, she can't walk a flight of steps! She's not trained well Gus! She can not walk a flight of steps. I bet she climb the fuck out a tree though, don't she Gus? Doesn't she? But you had to bring her out here! Fuck her! _

Rachel was holding her sides as she laughed. Even in her drunken high daze she wondered why she let Santana talk her in to smoking again. They had company the last time they smoked together too; things had gotten shall we say, heated. She wasn't sure if she wanted a morning after with Quinn.

_And your motherfucking children? They're Bigfeet too! They're half Bigfoot Gus. Cause the motherfuckers are nine years old and have afros fifteen inches long. They're little hairy motherfuckers just like their mother. Look at the motherfuckers, you know how I found out they was bigfoot? When I took your kids fishing last week. I put the motherfuckers in the boat Gus. And I took the worm and I put it on the hooks. And they both sat there, and put the poles down in the boat, and slammed their faces in the water for two whole minutes. And I think what the fuck are these kids doing. Then they start moving their heads like this __and the motherfuckers come up with fish. I jumped back and said: 'Can you believe this motherfucking shit.' Then the kid took the fish out of his mouth, looked at his brother and said: 'Goony goo goo!'_

"GOONY GOO GOO!" Santana and Rachel yelled as they laughed.

"Oh my God turn it off … my ribs … can't take any…" Quinn couldn't finish her sentence.

Rachel managed to reach for the remote that Santana seemed to be trying to hide and turned off the television.

"Party poopers," Santana playfully pouted.

"I hate you both right now," Quinn giggled.

"That's hurts Q," Santana said, "right here," she placed her hand over her heart.

"What did I do?" Rachel asked.

"You let her get me high then gave me stupid shit to laugh at and now I'm in pain," Quinn said through her giggles.

"Poor little tink tink; tell Aunty Snix all about it," Santana said as she took a swig of her beer.

Quinn promptly tossed a pillow at Santana who easily caught it and hit the side of Rachel's head with it.

"Wh-at?" Rachel drug out the word.

"No sleeping, wake up," Santana said.

Rachel had slouched down on the floor with her legs under the coffee table and her head leaning on the couch.

"I'm not sleeping … just … trying to refocus," she explained, "I'm assuming you two are not nearly done yet and if I keep going much longer without a small break I _will_ fall asleep."

"I know what'll keep you up," Santana says as she leans over and starts planting little kisses and nibbles on Rachel's neck.

"San stop playing," Rachel says as she playfully pushes Santana away.

"You two are totally sleeping together and neither of you bothered to tell me," Quinn says with mild surprise. With Santana's hormones she's honestly surprised it's taken so long.

"We are not," Rachel says as she wipes away the moistness that Santana left on her neck.

"No, but Rach totally watched this hot Italian chick eat me out," Santana replied.

"Wanky," Quinn laughed.

"Whatever. I was horny and live porn; couldn't help myself," Rachel stated.

"Yeah and I couldn't help watching Optimus Cawk," Santana said.

"Santana," Rachel whined.

"What the hell is Optimus Cawk?" Quinn asked.

"Optimus as in huge, Cawk spelled c-a-w-k meant to emphasize and make bolder the word cock, is our girl's not so little meat she's kept hidden from us all these years," Santana answered.

"San," Rachel said.

"Oh come on show her, Optimus Cawk is awesome," Santana nearly whined.

Quinn stared at them and blinked for a few moments before speaking. The movement of Santana's hand towards Rachel's crotch snapped her out of her daze. She watched as Rachel bit her bottom lip then moved Santana's hand away.

"Stop playing," Rachel said.

"Fine," Santana finished her beer then got up to get another one.

"Sorry again about all that nonsense we used to call you Rach," Quinn said.

"Way in the past Quinn, no need for more apologies," Rachel replied happily.

"Although I think you owe us an apology for not telling us once we got cool though," Santana said as she reentered the room and smirked at the face that Rachel gave her.

"Fucks sake she almost forgot," Rachel said.

"No actually I didn't now come on, I don't know not one person with a dick that doesn't want to show it off all the time, stop stalling and whip it out before we have to strip search you," Quinn mused, "and just so you know Rach, you're not the first girl I've met that was born like that; if that makes you feel any better."

It did actually make Rachel feel a little better.

"Goodness, fine," Rachel rolled her eyes as she stood.

"Somebody looks happy already," Quinn giggled.

"Not my fault," Rachel said with a grin as she unbuttoned her jeans, "I blame Santana groping me."

To be continued…


End file.
